Fury, Frustration, Failure and School Lunches

While it may not have been the most horrifying thing for a parent to experience, yesterday’s family food drama was this food mommy’s worst nightmare.

I get a note from my child’s school that her meal account balance is negative, and I wonder “what the heck? I just put $50 in about a month ago.” The good thing about the new internet-based system is that I can check what my child has been purchasing. The bad thing is that I discovered where all the money went: cookies and extra entrées. I was livid. I had really been perplexed as to why the healthier choices I had been giving my child, along with regular doses of exercise, had not produced any results. Guess I can’t blame Nana on this one.

The fury came first, and it was directed at the school: Why didn’t the cashier think it was inappropriate for an 8-year-old little girl to be buying so much food. I know they want to sell the cookies, but extra pieces of pizza, corn dogs, and hamburgers? (I know, you may be wondering, “what happened to taking lunch to school every day?” I’ll get to that later.) I can’t believe they even offer that. I don’t remember being able to buy extras when I was in school, even in high school. We were given a dollar every day, and what they provided for that dollar was all we got. I never thought that there was not enough food.

So, now I have a problem with the meal account system. Our society as a whole definitely has a problem with self-control – with food and spending – and this system obviously doesn’t do us a bit of good to control either. Fortunately, I was able to have a conversation with the cafeteria manager and they put a note in the system that my daughter is not allowed to purchase anything other than the $2 meal. However, they won’t be getting more money from me for a long time.

Next came the frustration: Why can’t I make my child understand how much food is necessary to sustain us, and that too much food is a bad thing? We have this conversation over and over, and I hate that I have to talk about food and health so much to my child. I just want her to make good choices so she does not have to worry about her health her entire life. It is not fun! I regularly allow my kids treats, but under the assumption that they are making good choices most of the time. This has obviously not been the case.

Finally comes the feeling of failure: I have failed my child because I let a busy life get in the way of better habits. For the first couple months of school, I was making her lunch every day (except one – check out “The Great Chocolate Milk Compromise”). Then she was accepted into the school choir which meant getting to school earlier a couple days of the week. So one day, became two, and then three. And finally she was lucky to get one lunch from home a week. I didn’t feel bad at the time because they changed the menu, and it looked pretty decent. I just had no idea that they let the kids buy as much as they want. I also stopped asking her what she was eating at school, and just assumed everything was peachy. I had a few hours of self-loathing, but finally came to realization that we just need to start anew.

Miss E now has no choice but to take her lunch to school every day. She also has to do extra chores to work off all the extra money spent on her school food extras, and no spending any nights away from home for a while. I might also be doing some hardcore research on the number of calories a young person should be getting, and show her what that looks like in terms of volume. The sheriff just got a little bit meaner.

Chocolate Milk Continued

The day following my blog post, "The Great Chocolate Milk Compromise," I saw a story in the Baltimore Sun that calories and sugar content are being reduced in flavored milk products. This is great news, and I'm glad the milk processors are thinking more about our children's health.

I also this week ran into my good friend Denise who is a dairy farmer and works for the Kentucky Dairy Development Council. She confirmed that my child was probably not exagerating about the white milk tasting funny at school. She said milk packaged in paperboard cartons can pick up odors from other foods quite easily. Denise also told me that one milk company is trying to get schools to purchase milk in recyclable plastic bottles and will then pick up the bottles to recycle them. One more "mooovelous" idea.

The Great Chocolate Milk Compromise

Thank goodness school is back in session, and my family is settling back into a regular schedule. But one thing is different this year. I am packing my child’s lunch every day.

I had not done that the last three years. I generally felt that what her school provided her was fine, and I am still convinced it is an economical, as well as time-saving way to go. However, since I have dedicated myself to be a bit more conscious of what my children are putting into their mouths, “fine” was not good enough.

Here are my biggest issues with the school lunches:

1) A few too many convenience foods – frozen pizza, chicken nuggets, corn dogs, etc.

2) Too few fresh fruit and veggie options.

3) The fact that I have no idea of the ingredients, calorie and nutrient content of those foods.

4) Chocolate milk.

Yes, I said it. I am sure my dairy farmer friends are not happy with me, but I don’t like the added sugar. What I don’t like even more is the fact that I could not convince my child to not drink the chocolate milk at school when she has been/is perfectly happy drinking regular skim milk at home. She says the school’s white milk tastes funny. I have a hard time believing this, and she is making the least favorable choice because it is available to her. On this issue, I have to agree with what Jamie Oliver (http://www.jamieoliver.com/) is trying to do with his “Food Revolution” at our schools.

Therefore, I am taking more control of my child’s diet by sending my food choices to school with her. They are usually full of fresh fruits and veggies, varying proteins, a light serving of grains, and water to drink. To date, she has been very happy with what I have been sending, and she has created her own menu list so she can request the different combinations. (Look for these lunches on this blog and on my Facebook page.)

HOWEVER, I am not a stalwart food mom all of the time, and I am open to compromise. So I told her she could pick one day a week to eat the school’s lunch. Since the school system has changed to a consistent weekly menu throughout the semester, she has decided that Thursday is her day. She will be eating chicken nuggets, a whole-grain roll, applesauce and (pain) chocolate milk. They do offer mashed potatoes and asparagus (canned), but she is not a fan of either. I can’t say that I blame her on the asparagus. Since she eats green veggies such as spinach, broccoli and fresh asparagus on a regular basis, I feel she can go without a veggie this one meal. We’ll make up for it at dinner.

After I started writing this blog, originally titled “Improving the School Lunch,” I decided to think about chocolate milk a little more. The average calorie content of an 8 oz. chocolate milk carton served at school is about 160. The average 12 oz. non-diet soda has about 155 calories. If those are my choices, I’ll gladly suggest the chocolate milk, for it actually has some good nutritional qualities: protein, vitamin A, vitamin D, calcium, energy-inducing fat and carbs, and a number of other vitamins and minerals. The difference in calories between the chocolate milk and the plain milk we drink at home is about one Dove dark chocolate, which I would have let her eat after dinner anyway.

Jamie Oliver makes a very compelling argument against chocolate milk – filling the school bus with the sugar a child consumes in a school year if drinking only flavored milk – but I fear many kids are getting much more sugar from candy, cookies, toaster breakfast foods, cereals, and sodas. While chocolate milk may not be the best choice, there are much worse things for our kids to consume in my mind, and I am glad I decided to take a more critical look. (Have you thought about how much sugar your child consumes in an average week and the foods that sugar comes from?) Thinking about parents who may not be able to send lunch to school with their kids, I am fine with schools continuing to serve flavored milk as it may be one of the more nutritious things they have all day. But could they maybe work with the stevia folks to reduce the sugar? Just a suggestion.

Miss E won’t be drinking chocolate milk every school day, but I won’t feel guilty about our compromise for 36 days out of the year. I think this agreement has actually made her more excited about making her own good food choices.

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Wordless Wednesday - School Lunch

What I sent with my 3rd Grader today for lunch - she ate every bit. That is broccoli soup in the bowl and the apple is halved with peanut butter inside (helps keep it from getting brown).