I was watching a Discovery Health show about a 600-pound mom
while my son was playing in the floor. He looked up at the television and said,
“Wow. She’s really big. She’s fat.” Aack. My first reaction was to tell him, “Yes,
she is big, but it’s not nice to say that someone is ‘fat’. It can hurt their
feelings.”
I had been so very careful when raising my older daughter to
never use that word when referring to anyone, and I scolded family members who
did use the word in front of her. I never wanted her to judge anyone by their
appearance or worry that someone may use that word to describe her appearance.
People rarely use that word to describe someone they like, so it is not a word
in our vocabulary.
So have I become more lax? Do I need to reinforce my
expectations with caregivers and family who are with my kids? I was not ready
to have this conversation with my son, but I guess it could have been worse.
My inquisitive boy began to ask more questions. “How did she
get like that?”
“She ate too much food, and food that was not healthy for
her,” I replied.
Then I was able to
turn it into a conversation about what is healthy food.
“What types of food are good for you?” He said he thought
Craisins, milk and nuts were good for him.
“What are types of bad food?” He said pizza and candy. Then
he sat there a minute and asked, “Then why do you let me eat pizza?” Great, he
turned it around on me.
“Well, I don’t let you eat pizza all the time, and I don’t
let you eat a lot of it.” Thank goodness that was the end of the talk, but I
know it will come up again. In fact, this morning he informed me that his
current cereal of choice was not healthy. I have decided not to share it
because I don’t know if I want anyone to know that I purchased it.
In the end, I am still sad that he learned what the word
means and felt the need to use it. The good news, however, is that this was one
more opportunity for us to talk about healthy eating, and I’m proud that my
preschooler is thinking about it. I praise God every day that I was blessed
with good eaters and we have no food allergies in my house. I also praise God
that I am able to set good examples for them and provide the food they need.
But my mission is now to find the culprit who taught him
that awful 3-letter word and give them a lecture about loving others and
themselves.
